The importance of anchoring Body Positivity into your Body Love journey

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28 Sep

It's hard to love your body without first experiencing body positivity. It’s easy to think they are the same thing, but in fact, they are quite different. Here are some definitions:

Body positivity emphasises the idea that all bodies are worthy and should be celebrated, regardless of their size, shape, or appearance.
On the other hand, body love centres on fostering a deep, personal, and emotional connection with one's body.

In other words, Body Positivity is an activist movement that challenges the deeply held societal beliefs that bodies should look a certain way to be healthy or valued. Body love is deeply personal and designed to help an individual take care of their body kindly and compassionately. I would argue that it’s not possible to feel body love without first leaning into the body positivity movement.

In this article, I will delve into the history of the body positivity movement and explain some practical ways to find positivity toward one’s own body as a stepping stone to body love.

So, where did Body Positivity come from?

Fat Activism began in the late 60s. One part of the movement was started by a man who was sick of the way his fat wife was being treated. Another part of the movement was started by radical feminists who wanted respect for all types of women’s bodies. Yet another part of the movement was started by black activists who saw the treatment of people with larger bodies as another type of oppression.

In the 90s the term “body positivity” became more mainstream as a reaction to the heroin chic that was in fashion at the time. When social media took off so did the body positivity movement. And so did the backlash. Opponents of the movement believe that body positivity glorifies obesity when it’s really saying that everyone deserves dignity and respect no matter their size or shape. Unlike diet culture, it’s not telling you to look a certain way, it’s just telling you it’s okay to look however you look and that your body shape doesn’t define you as a person. It’s inclusive rather than exclusive. That’s why I like it!

How to find body positivity for yourself

The first thing I want to mention is that we are not looking to feel positivity at all costs. This is definitely not a “fake it until you make it” situation! In fact, that’s what I call toxic positivity. In her book, Positivity, psychologist Barbara Frederickson says that faking positivity can cause stress, whether it’s consciously felt or not. Stress, as we know, has a negative impact on both physical and mental health and should be avoided if possible. Instead, it is best to create feelings of genuine positivity toward your own body. I assure you, even as a body love advocate, I don’t always love what I see in the mirror.

Since body positivity is about accepting all bodies and understanding that everyone is worthy despite their age, size, health status, race, or any other physical feature, it might be easier to start your journey by learning to appreciate a diverse range of bodies before you focus on your own! Personally, I found cultivating my social media feeds to show me a diverse range of body types helped me to be more accepting of my own body.

However, if you are keen to delve deeper into feeling more positively toward your own body, I highly recommend looking at the 10 different types of positivity that Barbara Frederickson outlines in her book. I’ll list them below with a personal example of how I see the different types of positivity for my own body.

1.      Joy – playing with my nieces and nephews makes me happy and I need my body to do that!
2.      Gratitude – I am grateful that I wake up every day and am well enough to attend to my work and hobbies.
3.      Serenity – The beautiful views around Albany make my heart full, and my eyes allow me to see them.
4.      Interest – Yoga is one of my biggest interests and I am so grateful that I get to use my body to teach this wonderful practice.
5.      Hope – I hope that sharing my own body love journey will help women to accept their bodies as they are and take care of them with love.
6.      Pride – I am so proud that I have used my body to teach hundreds of people yoga and other fitness over the years.
7.      Amusement – Sometimes my naked torso looks like a smiling face and that makes me laugh.
8.      Inspiration – I aim to inspire the activist in others by sharing unedited photos of my body online to show that you can be healthy, happy, and accepting of your body no matter its size, age, or anything else.
9.      Awe – after all the surgeries and pain, I am in awe of my body for still being here! How resilient is she?
10.   Love – after years of practice, I have learned to love my body even if it’s imperfect because it is the only one I’ve got!

Notice that most of these don’t have anything to do with the way I look. It’s hard to encourage a sense of awe in people with your physical appearance so it seems a little silly to try! I encourage you to put pen to paper and start to see these different types of positivity in your own life. Maybe starting with body examples is a step too far, and that’s okay. Instead, just start to cultivate your positive mindset by noticing these positive elements in your life at any time.

How to anchor in body positivity

Once you start to see the positive aspects of your body it’s important to anchor them in. We are constantly bombarded with messages that we aren’t good enough just the way we are so reminding yourself of your body positivity and body love is essential. That’s the step of The Body Love Method that I call positive anchors. Here are some examples:

Visual Reminders – I have a small love heart tattoo on my left wrist. I got this at the beginning of my body love journey to remind me of my mission to love and accept myself as best as I can. Now, I’m not saying you need to go out and get a tattoo but how could you remind yourself of your mission to find positivity in your body? Maybe a photo of your kids on your fridge to remind yourself to be a body-loving role model to them. Or even just a handwritten note on a Post-it.

Affirmations – It takes a while to unlearn the negative thoughts and feelings we have been taught about our bodies, so it makes sense that we need to hear more positive words to replace the old negative ones. I have created a free body love affirmation audio for you to download so you can start changing your mindset straight away.

Loving Kindness Meditations – I mention loving kindness meditations a lot when I talk about Body Love. That’s because I think it’s one of the most powerful tools to help us show ourselves the same amount of love that we show others. If you do nothing else, can I ask you to try this Loving Kindness meditation?