My before & after photos and how my body image improved after I gained weight

When I started my health coaching career in 2012 I was in the grips of a really bad relationship with my body. I was anxious every day about how much I weighed, how my clothes looked on my body, whether I was pretty enough, if I had eaten right, what my next meal would be, if I’d done enough exercise and if I would be able to perfect for my clients. I almost put that perfect in quotation marks but didn’t because when I think back on it, I wanted to be truly perfect. I wanted to look like a movie star and behave like a fitness influencer and that was before influencers were invented. I was sure that if I wasn’t perfect then I wouldn’t have clients, I wouldn’t be healthy, I wouldn’t be loved. That’s a lot of pressure to put on a person. But I know I’m not alone.

Since 2012 I have gained 15+ kilos, partly because I have been through menopause, partly because I have aged 10 years, partly because I no longer adhere to strict diets and punishing exercise programs and also because I used to adhere to strict diets and exercise programs. One of the main precursors to weight gain is weight loss. Over 90% of people who deliberately lose weight through dieting will put the weight back on and about 65% of people will put on MORE weight than they lost. A dieter’s metabolism gets screwed in the dieting process and it will never go back to the way it was.

I’m not here promoting weight gain per se, but what I am promoting is living without dieting. Not only does it fuck with your metabolism, it can often result in a lower nutrient dense intake of food, lower energy levels, low self esteem and lead to eating disorders which can be fatal.

(Click here to read about the 10 things I’ve learned after 10 years in the health & fitness industry)

Since I gave up diets for good in 2019 (I started playing with the idea in 2017 but got serious when I taught my students in The Body Love Academy. I’m a firm believer in walking your talk) I have gained some weight but have continued healthy behaviours such as focusing on gentle nutrition which is part of intuitive eating and also gentle exercise. Additionally I use my yoga practice to manage stress, move my body and create a lifestyle of mindfulness and gentleness. I am happy to say that at 49 I have a healthy heart and cholesterol and no diabetes. I do have an auto immune disease and endometriosis but those things are not related to weight.

I’ve had to dive deeply into my self-worth and learn and know that I am a worthy person no matter my size or shape or age or any other external or internal factor. Even if I had more health problems, I would still be worthy. All humans are worthy. Read that again.

So here’s a list of some of things that have changed over the past 10 years - can you relate?

BEFORE (2012)   AFTER (2022)

⭐ Daily disappointment on the scale ⭐ Daily smiles in the mirror

⭐ Governed by the internal food police ⭐ Intuitive eating

⭐ Anxious ⭐ Content & calm

⭐ Never small enough ⭐ Always knows she’s enough

⭐ Drinking daily ⭐ 22 months sober

⭐ Judgmental of self and others ⭐ Kind to self and others

⭐ Exercise for punishment or for a result ⭐ Exercise because it feels good

⭐ Always tired ⭐ Mostly energised

⭐ Stuck because “not good enough” ⭐ Creative and having fun with life

⭐ Faking happiness ⭐ Truly happy with life and excited for what’s to come

How have things changed for you and your body over the last 10 years?

If you would like to delve deeper into all of this and start to heal your relationship with your body then get in touch.  I have a 6-week private coaching program where I provide a safe and supportive space to unpack your body image and help you create a fail-proof health & well-being plan to support you physically and mentally.  This personalised program is $395.  Click here to book a free, no-obligation 15-minute chat to see if it’s for you.

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